Personal Space Bubble – Wearable Isolation for Modern Life
Category: Fake
Estimated Price: £27.50
Introducing the Personal Space Bubble™ – your very own mobile fortress of solitude. Say goodbye to awkward queue conversations, mysterious shoulder-touchers, and the social minefield of small talk. Simply unzip, step in, inflate, and immediately enjoy a 1.2m radius of glorious isolation.
Made from ethically sourced introversion and reinforced TPU, this inflatable dome shields you from germs, gossip, and Gregg from accounting. Whether you're on the bus, in a shop, or simply trying to avoid neighbours, the Personal Space Bubble™ helps you stay safe, sane, and unapologetically distant.
Comes with an optional passive-aggressive banner that reads “I’m Not Rude, Just Reserved.”
Brand: BoundaSphere
Dimensions: 1.2m diameter (fully inflated), folds to backpack size
Materials: Transparent TPU, soft-touch neoprene straps, reinforced eye-roll panel
Colour(s): Mostly clear, with optional tinted privacy panel (Mildly Judgy Grey)
Other Specifications: Inflates in under 90 seconds, includes one-way zipper for snack access, breathable ventilation with anti-chat filter, includes "I'm Fine" flag for family events
What We Think
Some products arrive too late for the moment, and others arrive *exactly* when the world is still slightly traumatised and craving 6ft of breathing room. The Personal Space Bubble™ is the perfect marriage of ridiculous and relatable. We tested this in various real-life settings – the post office queue, a family BBQ, and even a very confused yoga class. It performed beautifully in all scenarios.
The zippered access was surprisingly useful for quick snack deployment, and the privacy panel let us dramatically pretend not to see people we knew from secondary school. The anti-chat mesh did a brilliant job muffling unsolicited life advice from nearby strangers, and while you do get the occasional double-take, most people just give you even more space. Which is, let’s be honest, the dream.
It’s lightweight, packs down small, and inflates faster than your social anxiety at a networking event. We’re obsessed.
What Others Are Saying
💬 “I wore it to Tesco. A child tried to poke it, but bounced off harmlessly. Truly magnificent.” – Janet, 58
💬 “Used it on public transport. Didn’t get asked ‘what book are you reading’ once. Result.” – Leon, 32
💬 “As someone who hates group hugs and most people, this has changed my life. Also waterproof.” – Grace, 41
💬 “I brought this to a wedding and sat happily in the corner, unnoticed and unbothered. Bliss.” – Darren, 29
Verdict
Whether you’re protecting yourself from viruses or just extreme social interaction, the Personal Space Bubble™ lets you float through life with dignity intact and strangers at bay. It’s part comedy prop, part genuine lifesaver. Get one for every introvert in your life – or just hoard them so no one tries to talk to you about the weather ever again.